Tuesday, June 19, 2007

We Don't Need No Education

"Mate, where I come from, we got Bond Uni, ya know? I mean some people can't help brainy, but they shouldn't go round expecting some sort of a free lunch out of it, eh"

Speaking from her Gold Coast home while recovering from Jetlag, CACA Icon Schappylle Scragg announced her intervention in the art schools debate recently this week. Scragg says that she was moved to speak out amidst increasing media attention to the 'crisis' in Arts education in Western Sydney.

"Yeah, well I been down to Sydney and I seen all those fancy McMansions and I reckon all those westies are getting up themselves, just coz they've all got such big mortgages eh?. I mean why do they think they are so special?"

"They've got all those people moving in and getting rich and all those migrants that they've let in now. I mean I've heard that some of these people like sitting around reading books and learning instruments - like those Japanese kids on the violin. do you call that Australian?"

"Just because people want a better life for their kids, doesn't mean they have to go around trying to get all up themselves and start reading books and studying art. A good Aussie artist like Pro hart never had no art education and he was the greatest Aussie artist that ever lived. Everyone knows that."

"If people wanna be some kind of tall poppy they can go overseas. but if they wanna be true to the aussie values that made this country great, then they should work hard and not rock the boat. you don't need a bloody art degree to drive around in a decent set of wheels or to live in decent house. Me and Darryle get all our home renovation tips from the telly - and all his mates say our home is a work of art in itself."

"I reckon those westies need to take a good look at themselves. I mean, if they can't keep Australia's Wonderland open - then what kind of culture do they think they've got? what tourist is going to go to a bloody art gallery? Everyone knows that real Aussies prefer sport, eh?"

Scragg made the announcements and got so worked up she had to have a bundy and coke to settle down. she then decided to fly down to sydney to check out the situation herself.

"I'm gonna go to Darling Harbour, and then I'm going to find some of those arty farty types and show them what REAL AUSSIE CULTURE REALLY IS. If they can't have that in western Sydney, then they're kidding themselves."

Scragg has decided to call her project "Independence Day" in honour of the movie. she'll make a number of public appearances on the 4th July in order to encourage ordinary australians to band together to fight for the aussie spirit.

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